Batchelorette Party

So my bachelorette party was this weekend and it was pretty ridiculous. Here are some of the highlights I thought I would share, broken down by location:

here is a play by play of the evening's memorable events, broken down by location.

PF Changs:
-kyle pops up out of no where and surprises me. my girlfriends from school, sarah, jacqui, and jess are there. so is one of kyle's best friends from college who i adore who lives in boston.
-we eat dinner and start drinking
- they give me a sash and a GIANT PINK TRUCKER HAT that says "LUSHING BRIDE" which i obviously wear proudly for the rest of the evening.

Sweetwater: (the Mooonies of downtown boston, right across from NESL)
- the rest of the girls from my class are there!
- we all start taking shots
-they give me a tee shirt to wear with a list of stuff i have to make guys do by the end of the night, and a marker they can use to initial every completed task.
- i take another shot, drink a beer start collecting signatures.
- i go up to some guys and tell them they can choose a task to do. they stare at my chest for 3 minutes. i turn to kyle and say VERY loudly "they are just looking at my tits!!"
- guy #1 drops his pants and shows me his boxers. he initials
- guy #2 takes a condom out of his wallet and blows it up like a balloon. i make sure he has another one in case he hooks up that night-- i said i didn't want him to have unsafe sex because of me. he assured me it was fine and then kissed me on the neck. nice! i give the condom to the bartender who is laughing hysterically at me. she proudly displays it over the draught beers. he initials.
-- i take more shots and approach another group of guys, hoping to have my entire shirt accomplished by the end of the night. i tell this one to "tell me about his sex life." kyle was with me. he told us he "fucked some girl on wednesday night" and when i said "who is this person?" he said, "well she wasn't really a person..." kyle and i took this as an opportunity to laugh openly at him for five minutes until he got so pissed that he refused to sign. when he offered to initial "show me your six pack" i counted and said, "sorry you can't sign-- i only see five!!" his friends were laughing hysterically at him. he sulked.
-- i call ann and blab to her on the phone. this turns out to be my only phone call of the night.
-- more shots.

Boston Subway System
-- i get on and bee line to a group of guys
-- they all do tasks and initial
-- my friends are taking pictures
--strangers are laughing at me
-- i see guys from my high school who recognized my sister randomly on the street. i spank their bottoms. they initial the tee shirt.


Tequila Rain
-- i take more shots and start dancing WILDLY, definitely waving my elbows everywhere. this is where things start to get hazy.
-- a crazy, disgusting bald guy starts dancing around us. we try to ignore him but he is just too obnoxious.
-- kyle tells him, "could you please dance elsewhere? we are just trying to have fun with our friends." he retailiates by slapping/grabbing kyle's ass. kyle turns around and SMACKS HIM as hard as she can! he recoils-- he is shocked and a little in pain. kyle gets the bouncer and has him thrown out. the party rejoices. everyone buys kyle a shot.
-- everyone keeps dancing. i dance with a crazy gay guy who is trying to show off. he does NOT want to dance with me because i am such a mess. i am no longer collecting signatures
-- the night is over when i realize that i am obliviously dancing all by myself. everyone else is tired or had to leave to get the train. kyle and i go home to my apartment where dre has pizza waiting for us. sammy c calls saying i could come over for weed. i pass out while on the phone with him

that's pretty much all i can remember, or what has been told to me. illustrations are forthcoming. i can't wait to see you all at the wedding! xoxo